^^ i wanna learn that song on acoustic guitar.

dudes.....i fell in love. i think i did. thats how i felt. i felt like i fell in love, because there was this feeling that i never felt when i was with her. but now i look back at it, and idk if it was or not. i really dont know. was it an incredible amount of lust?? or was it something out of the ordinary?? i dont think i seriously fell in love. when i fall in love, i know i would want to marry that person. and i didnt want to marry that person. so i guess it wasnt love. but then again....i really dont know.

january was amazing. i think?? i know january 2nd was a night to remember. i know that a very good friend of mine names jew came back up to paulding county from college. and we caught up with a bang. ironically, that was the same day i told my girlfriend that i loved her. annnyway, me, jew, and mark were basically screwing around all day. it was pretty fun. going random places to eat and all. good times. i remember taking about 40 wings from pizza hut, and then throwing about 20 of them on my girlfriends driveway just to piss the parents (that hate me...now i see why haha) off. it was glorious. and i barely use that word. haha that night, i had my first energy drink in a while. those caused some really weird effects on me, and sent a signal into my brain to never drink an energy drink again. heres what happened:

me, jew, and mark go to walmart. there i buy the energy drink. i drank it. we were waiting in the wal-mart parking lot for tim. (tim was watching a movie with samantha) i start to get hyper. along with hyperness comes paranoia. we all were chilling outside jew's car, when another car pulls up (about 50 feet from us) and comes to a complete halt for about 30 seconds. it looked like they were planning a drive by. i react crazy, like it is a drive by and i dive in the car. obviously the people in the car were acting like it was a drive by, because they suddenly zoomed past us, and they were holding something out their window. by this time, i was already in the car doing the duck and cover. it wasnt a gun. it was a....*sigh*....video camera. jew and mark were laughing, while was in a panic attack. and for the next 45 MINUTES, jew decides to play cat and mouse with these people around wal-mart, and on the MFN street. for some reason i was scared for my life. i call tim, and frantically start jabbering on the phone with him. he has no idea what im saying. but either way...i almost shat myself haha. we eventually lost them ,and the rest of the night was crazy. i already posted a longggg story about the drink, so ima make the night brief. we went to downtown atlanta and did NOTHING. tim was being a dick the whole night. he drove for an hour looking for a porno store, which turned out to be closed when we got there. it was 3AM, of course it was closed! >=[ other than that, i had an encounter with a crackhead. i made some comments to him that couldve gotten all my friends shot, but i knew a crackhead wouldnt have a gun. so i just laughed at him. as crappy as this sounds i love putting peoples lives in jeopardy (when i know for a FACT that they wont die) because they get that scared feeling.....wow....im pretty messed up haha. dont worry, i put my life in joepardy all the time (ask tim).

its weird that my entry was this long, and im only on the second day of the month. well! i guess ill summarize the rest of the month briefly:

I DONT REMEMBER.

kyler is right. that song^^ by jason mraz got oldddddd. haha

december started out amazing. AMAZING, people. i got a new girlfriend! woot! haha i was too happy. but i believe theres no such thing as "too" happy. =]]


anyway. december is fuzzy to me. OH! now i remeber, i was stressing like balls to get my grades up to pass the MFN semester. it was really ahrd for me. i didnr pass all my classes. i failed one, but i took a recovery class in january to make things up. paulding county has so many dumb people, (yes, including me) that they have a recovery plan for people who failed a classs by 10 points maximum. i failed algebra 2 with a 60. i took a test, and i passed with a 70. WTF haha. but anyways....december was a grand month. i got the dark knight on DVD. i love impersonating the joker. apparently people say im good at it. =] but i havent done it in a while, so dont ask for me to do it for you. december was also a big stress for me because of college. i havent done anything. i havent started my senior project (and now im halfway done) and i just NOW ordered my cap and gown. i still havent paid my senior dues yet...im screwed. i hope i can graduate haha. wait, thats not funny. i seriously hope i can graduate! christmas was "eh". to be completely honest, i said merry christmas to everyone, then i stayed in my room for about 9 hours straight, and played NCAA football 08. then my friend righic picked me up, and we went to hooters of all places. hooters. hooters is overrated, their food is mediocre, and the girls arent that good looking. sorry hooters fans, thats just the way i feel. but chrictmas break went pretty well. and i will leave you with a cliffhanger. i said something that i meant in january...and it was bigggggggg.

hmmmm...how do i want to end this???

OH!.....808'S AND HEARTBREAK is a pretty good album. im not gonna lie.

ahhhhhhh...november sucked. i really dont want to talk about it. i will put it in simple phrases.

GOOD

leading role in a play (sleepy hollow)
met an amazing girl
i....ummm.....idk.
added a drummer to my band!
annnndddd that may be it. i cant think of anything else good.

BAD
mom makes me see a therapist.
get threatened to be kicked out the house.
go into a DEEP state of depression. become incredibly suicidal (why am i making this public??)
.....WTF.

i have no idea what to put on this entry...my mind is boggling from all the terrible stuff (that i dont feel like putting down) that happened to me.

fuck november.

^^ good song by i set my friends on fire. check em out.

it seriously has been a while since i last posted a journal enrty. (almost 7 months). and so many good and bad things have happened to me, i thought i would seperate the journal entries by months. so this one is october:

well, from i remember, i had an excellent birthday. i went to taki with a few friends, and apparently played my "last" game of DDR that night...although months later, i would have an epic relapse haha. the next day, i wennt with my cousins to six flags. now that was some good stuff. i remember being so scared to turn 18, because i thought my whole body was going to transform into something weird...idk, im weird haha. but nothing much really happened as sooon as i turned 18. just a little more responsibilities. but as the month went on, me and this girl kind of had a thing for eachother. at the time i was stupid for what i was doing. we would talk on the phone, but she would get high all the time. it bothered me, but at the same time, i didnt really care what she did. frequently during the month, i would pick her up at her house, and we would hang out. the majority of those times, she was either intoxicated, or high. once again, i didnt care. then there was this one night when i went to a friends house. she was incredibly...high. and then i realized, when we were doing stuff (no, we werent having sex, or doing anything too sexual) that what i am doing is not right. she just wanted me to get in her pants. and deep down inside, i knew that i had to stop. i made up some lame excuse not to have sex with her, and then i booked home. i realized i was taking advantage of this girl, and it saddended me to know i was doing that. so i made an oath to myself not to date ANY girl that smokes weed, or drinks just to get wasted. not because of the "advantage" thing...although it should be, but its just the path that i, and her were headed to. i didnt smoke. i dont smoke, i dont drink, i dont swear. its just not me. i mean if i could have a girl that didnt smoke or drink, i wouldnt have to be worried about her doing some over-the-top crazy stuff to ruin her life, you know?? actually, today i saw her in the hallway, and she was an emotional wreck. it was because of the drugs, and the drama that comes with it. and it really saddened me to see her like that. i really just want her to stop, before something teerrible happens.

towards the end of the month...actually halloween was pretty....boring. i went to work....then i went to brookes house with kyler, and watched the notebook. that basically sums it up for october. nevember, here i come! haha


"blame it on the corporate skyscrapers in the clouds. but if it wasnt for you, we wouldnt have all these multiple friends. how am i supposed to choose which one i belong to?"

-i set my friends on fire--things that rhyme with orange

okkkkkkkkkkk.

its been over a MONTH since i posted a journal entry.....and i really dont feel like doing one right now. so i will just give you a timeline on what ive been doing for the past month:


i got madden 09.

i started school.

im in a play called the templeton (which is on my birthday), and scrooged.

hoopefully i get to be in sleepy hollow.

i met a wonderful girl.

we started dating on a wednesday.....

....broke up the following monday.

no hard feelings, she is still amazing. =]

became incredibly depressed (BEFORE) the break up, and had sevvvvvvvveral thoughts of "ending it".

seeking counseling????? well, thats what my mom wants me to do.

i think thats it.

my birthday is (10-03).

lets chill.

THERE IS NONE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

haha yessssssss a 2 part blog title....awesomeness.....but yess, i know its been a while since my last journal entry....but alot has been going on fo sho. and im still a happy person, despite some things that happened during the week. lemme give you an update in the life of nate enthusiasm.


OK. so i was told tuesday that my cellphone bill was $143. SHIT! i dont have unlimited texting, so it builded up and its my own fault. also, my paycheck comes in the following saturday, but i barely worked...i think 5 days in 2 weeks.......aaaaannnnnd madden 09 comes out the following tuesday (tomorrow). i put down about $50 on the madden 09 pre-order. so now im like, damn cause i was going to go to the midnight sale of madden 09...and my mom wants me to take out the pre-order money to pay the bill. THAT AINT HAPPENING. soooo i was very angry during the middle of the week, although i was determined to get madden and pay my bill.

i got my paycheck on saturday...came out to $95. so! my mother took out $71, which is half the cellphone bill for you slow people, and left me with about $28 in the bank...(i had like...3 extra $$$)....so, still doomed i had to come up with 20 something dollars, i think i owe gamestop $44.....soo me and jew were talking about it on saturday and he said he'll pay about $25 to it. thats a true brother right there, and obviously gonna pay him back, and more (as in money you pervs)...so i think im safe for tuesday. buuuuuutttttt....my mom...i still gotta tell her im going to the midnight sale of madden 09...and im going regardless of a yes or no answer......so there you have it. my freakin quest to get a video game. i have no life, i know. but its a fun journey to figure stuff out. =]]

aside from that, my week went pretty well....forgot most of what happened, but thats all good. this past saturday was my bands official photoshoot (still without all the members)...but still it was pretty badass. =]]

as for now im still the happiest person alive no matter what happens. =]] i gotta stay optimistic and stay away from the "emo" me hahahaa.....tonight should be epic....tomorrow......drhkjgfhvjkfhvsvjk!!!!!!!!!! MADDEN 09 all mfn day....you dont understand, ima be at circuit city from like...10-3 in a madden tournament. kelso entered, and mark is entering...jew i think too. i gotta stay confident and not talk as much crap as i usually do....cause people may be better than me.

hmmmmmmmmmm....taylor is one of the coolest kids alive. shes amazing. =]]]]]] (just thought i should point that statement out. =])

till then....im happy, black, and looking foward to alot of things. sooo i may not post a bulletin for a while (madden 09, duh) so i tried to put all i have in this one....till then, goodnight!

10-25-08 weezer show....i MUST go.....anyone else want to come?

HELLLLOOOOOO EVERYONE!



so im basically the happiest, content person on the face of the earth......why? because i came to a realization...well jew (thats a person) helped me come to a realization.

nate MFN enthusiasm needs to stop stressing about girls! because i repeatedly get let down and then i was like fuck girls. (not like "that")....then i talked to jew later on and told me some stuff that changed me as a person. i need to just take it all in stride.

AND THATS WHAT IMA DO. =]

right now, everything i planned to type down on this entry has not been typed yet, and now im just rambling my mouth. lets get down to business.

the past......(6?) months i have been repeatedly letdown and/or denied by a few girls that i liked. andddd that brouught me downnnn and just made me wonder about girls in general....should i stop? (not turn gay) but just stop talking to girls altogether?

then i talked to jew and now i just have a different outlook about everything.

now i wake up happy because im not worried about ANYTHING. im just going to be MYSELF, not anybody else. ima just take this one day at a time....and i feel better than ever doing so. the girl for me will come when i least expect it, at just a random time.....not scowering for #s at stars and strikes (see entry below) or at the mall.....im not that kind of person that wants to get 5 numbers in one night.

so im not gonna be picky anymore, im not gonna go on a scavenger hunt, ima just CHILL and be nate MFN enthusiasm. =D

but i know i havent posted an entry in about 3 days.....ive been a lazy bastard haha...i think the last one wassssss saturday? so lemme give you an update.

saturday:had the "talk".

sunday:did the church thang. fun. =] chilled with the dude jew and mark...mark "fake" called out work with food poisoning. we went to stars and strikes, again, and played DDR laser tag (it was decent) and just chilled....OH! and by the way......im sorry people, but the vegetarian project came to a crashing end when we went to panda express.....i saw chicken and i couldnt take it anymore....black man has gotta have his chicken. haha =] i rode a 4-wheeler for the first time in my life......frightening, fun, but not for me. we FINALLY went to that KKK bar!!!! i was scared for my freakin life....it was closed though....i wanna go back though...and make it out alive. i know im crazy but still....itl be EPIC. =] the vegetarian situation got worse when we went to IHOP later on that night. our waiter was high as a kite, but he was the collest dude ever. we got pics on my myspace. =].

tuesday: spent the day with kelso and tim. we went to fret not and put our bands' EP on display for FREE. so go get it. aaaaand we are still looking for a drummer. =]i tried to teach kelso the songs because shes thinking about being our guitarist. she had a problem strumming, but its all good.....i gave her the tabs, ans theres a guitar at her house so she can practice then. =]

today i have done absolutely nothing today except clean and be on myspace. i gotta mow the lawn later on today. meh. but im still all smiles and optimistic about everything. im REALLY diggin this new feeling for myself. =]]]]]]

how should i close this while not saying "you people never read these journal enteries"

ah!

...."and its you, i still cant believe its true! down where its cold, and i let myself go. Its contrived, and inside i think ive died. but ill go on, your always by my side."

the fall of troy--oh, the casino?!

im pissed off at dance gavin dance. (thats a band....and the title up there is one of their songs) why?? because i looked up the dates for their fall tour. they go to florida, SKIP grorgia altogether, and then head to tennessee. thats fucked up.

done ranting with DGD....


last night work was hell....lori was there for 4 hours and i couldnt take her crazy ass.....we got killed (somewhere over 300 orders when i left at 9:30).....basically we got our asses KICKED! and i was glad to get the hell out of there.

NOW! the fun started after work. me mark and kyler went to stars and strikes and didnt get home till about 1AM. i really coundnt describe to you what happened at stars and strikes, but my man lil duvall explains it all.

check it out:







hahahaha now with that being said, me nor kyler used the wird "bitch".


today should be a decent day....mall, DDR, shopping, work.

mark, everyone told you to WAX your eyebrows, not shave it all off!

=]

ok im having serious writers block trying to figure out how to post this fucking journal entry about denial to the point where itll make sense to you.

but i cant think straight, and its making me angry. all the thoughts i had on this entry came into my head last night...i still have them now, but i just dont know how i can put it into actual words.........so im making this a part one of two blogs....

part one is this right here....explaining what i want to talk about. girls. and......wait for it.....DENIAL. and when you ask a girl out their denial response is ALWAYS the same. "lets just be friends".

idk about you other guys who feel the same way like me, but that excuse is getting oldddddddd. it gets quite annoying after a while.......

this writers block is kinda going away, BUT im going to save the best for last and post it in part two.

this is a verrry important blog for me, maybe thats why im having serious writers block, because idk how to put it and make sense to not just girls, but guys too.

it may be days, weeks, even months before i post part two. but when i do, itll make more sense than this journal entry. much more.

its not like anyone reads this in the first place.....i might as well post it in a bulletin on myspace to MAKE you guys read it.

but as for my day.....yesterday, i didnt do anything, and i gotta work today. nothing exciting at all.

im trying to figure out a way to end this entry.

the first title (why cant we be friends?) IS a song title.

just so you know.

i love that song. ^^

ive been against lil wayne for the longest time because all he uses is metaphors, and claims that he is the best rapper alive. bullshit. but it just happens that in tha carter III, his metaphors are a little better, with beats better than tha carter II and the original carter. (maybe because mannie fresh isnt making his beats, since he heft cash money in 2004)....but tha carter III is hot, ill admit. BUT he will NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER be the "best rapper alive".

ok dont ranting with weezy....

well ive gone 2 full days without eating meat, and my mom is starting to bother me about balancing my diet. well....gimme some beans or something haahahha. i feel better than ever since i stopped eating meat and its really not as bad as i thought it would be.

today is just another day. i just got finished working out with kyler (just to let you know, working out is an everyday thing for us excluding weekends) and my abs are KILLING KILLING KILLING me. so are my arms, but i do the ab-roller thing every single day.

i think i might call in to go to work today...they only gave me 8 hours this week.....that shit has gotta stop. im only working friday and saturday. (the 2 busiest days of the week)......I NEED MONEY! my next paycheck is gonna suck badly....and i need $44 to pay off my madden 09 (collectors edition) that comes out august 12th. my paycheck comes the saturday before.....so my paycheck will be a little less than $100....damn.

other than that i have nothing to do as usual.....i hate paulding county...seriously...i cant wait for school to start, because 95% of the people i hung out with in school i havent seen all summer, so shit! i wanna learn again! hahaha.

i just think.....if i were in florida right now, i would have my video camera recording the craziest shit, either at the clubhouse, or at baywalk just chillin. but i still think about the troubles......if i were florida right this second, there would be a 75% chance that i wouldve been dead from suicide, or in a mental instution from doing some really crazy shit man. so in a way, i dont wanna go back to florida because of thos 2 reasons. and it also makes me think....the people here in paulding county DRASTICALLY changed me....for the better. so even thought that this is the worst place on the face of the earth, you have the greatest people on the face of the earth here. =]

anyway....i have yet to post that jounal entry ive been wanting to post for a while.....i think i will do it tomorrow. or as soon as MORE people other than jew and darien (sorta) read my journal enteries.......so this stuff is really pointless for me to be typing out....but at the same time, i want to because it gets my current feelings out.

i need a shower.

well it the second to last day of july, and its pulling closer to my senior year in high school. i actually really wanna go back to school because 95% of the people i went to school with i rarely/never see them outside of school.

yesterday went well, but i was bored most of the day...around 11 something i went to go workout with kyler......came home.....tuomas came over to get his guitar, and we talked S.A.K.O.A. stuff....did a mini photoshoot haha. it was pretty badass.

i basically layed in the house dying of boredom until kyler came and got me to go to stars and strikes. it was pretty obvious what we did there: DDR.

the weird thing is....99% of the people that play DDR there (that are good) get made fun of like crazy. from what i heard, people step on their arrows while they are playing, call them names, mock them on the other mat, and various other stuff. they KNOW BETTER not to do that to me.....hahahaha. i was told a story that on monday some guy was on DDR and he was friggin INSANE at it. so some drunk redneck started making fun of him, calling him names and stepping on his arrow and such. the DDR guy got very angry and started screaming at him, banging on the DDR screen, yelling: "COME BACK YOU MOTHERFUCKER! ILL BEAT YOUR ASS!" when the drunk redneck guy started to leave. the DDR guy talked to the manager and somehow he got unlimited gaming for the rest of the night. later on that night, i guess the redneck had another confrontation with the DDR guy, and the DDR guy got decked in the face by the drunk redneck. the redneck obviously got banned from stars and strikes.

its pretty messed up to see how DDR players get made fun of like that. its really not cool. just leave us alone. i know i sound "stupid" right now, but still if i see ANYONE (not a girl/woman) fuckin with my song on DDR, i will beat them senseless and thats the MFN truth. its not cool throwing us off on songs, and stepping on the arrows while we are doing the songs.

wellllllll stepping away from my DDR rant....

yesterday...i DIDNT eat meat!.....and yes, i ate. =]....at stars and strikes, i had a chicken caesar wrap without the chicken! im proud of myself, and you shold be proud of me. =] i promise you and myself that i will keep this vegetarian experiment up as long as humanly possible!

today should be a decent boring day in the life of nate MFN enthusiasm. ima go workout with kyler in an hour, then idk wtf im doing. if kelso isnt doing working, ima try to go over to her house or have her come over here so she can learn some S.A.K.O.A. songs....shes interested in being our guitarist. =]

well there might be a part 2 to this day's journal entry, so look out for that.

seriously, does ANYONE read my joournal entries?

From now on my titles to journals will strictly be song titles. Just because.

WELL!

Monday was quite.......interesting. It was marks birthday, so we picked him up around....12? Kelso took 20 years to get ready. Mark was pissed and it was quite funny. We went to little caesars and ordered the best pizza for a cheap-o price. It was amazimg.

Our destination for the day was Atlanta. It really isn't as good as anyone expected......there were alot of crackheads. I'm talking at least 5 on every corner...the only place we went to n atlanta was the underground. It was pretty lame.....so we were bored in atlanta so we decided to head to Lenox square mall in buckhead. We go los so we jus we to arbor place. We did the usual there and suprisingly I didn't play DDR atthwall (mostly because it was about to close) but still....

We left arbor place and went to go see hancock. Pretty good movie, cheesy-ass ending though. Came home at 12.

But yeah today is a new day and a new beginning for Nate MFN enthusiasm.
Stattng today I am experimenting with becoming a vegetarian. Yeeeepppp I said it. Make fun of me, i don't give a shiiiiiiiit! I'm excited to we how this turns out. If i become one, so be it. If I break and start eating meat again, then I know I can't do it. But umma try anyway.

Well I think that's it for today I'm gonna go play DDR at stars and strikes.

I'll try to keep this thing updated.

Don't do drugs.

well I haven't posted a blog since.....Friday I think?

This wekend has been shitty. More shitty than fun. Excuse the language but I want it to get it overwith....well it's 1:30 am Monday so I guess it's over.

Well my cousins came down, which is a plus. Although I made a bad decision to not take the weekend off at work. Therfore I had to work 5-10 all weekend. all three days at work were crappy, and I hate my job now...it isn't fun anymore. After I got off work ok Friday, the cousins, mark, tim, and I went to stars and strikes to hang out and visit the wonderful kelso haha. That was pretty fun.

Saaaaaaaturday, me and my cousins had to help my uncle move out of his apartment and put his stuff into storage. Keep in mind I went to bed at about 4 am and woke up at 8 am so I was a zombie, and had a high fatigue while moving the stuff. I got paid Saturday so I was happy I realized that. Went to hell (work), and I forgot what happned after that. Whatever it was it wasn't fun.

Sunday, got up for church, realized I wasn't going after I got ready and in the car, because kereem was sick. So I went back to bed and woke up around noon. I had to help my uncle again to move stuff, then once again, I went to work.

Basically I'm tired and I don't want to talk to anybody and I just feel like scribbling--well typing my feelings on this blog jounal thing.

And lately, well, ally recently, I have become verry lonely. I'm talking about girls people. It's been over 2 years since my last relationship, and I'm growing really impatient even though people have been telling me to wait and be patient. What I do NOT want to do is get desperate and have a "hook-up" with some random girl and/or date the wrong girl for me that I think is "good enough" for me and have the relationship last for 2 weeks or less.......I'm a guy that has a mindset of girl when it comes to relationships, but I dont really care if you make fun of me for that. But enough of me talking about this. I'm pretty sure to are tired of me talking about this. I rant alot. So what?

Well tomorrow...or today should be a good day. It's marks birthday, but the important part is--hahaha (kidding mark) pct4 and we will invade bankhead. That's right, bankhead nigga.

And about girls.....I'm not picky, I just......ok I came to another realization.

I'm the pickiest guy EVER.

warning: im in a very foul mood, so this journal entry may contain strong language i usually wouldn't say.

last night was my bands show at the insomnia. I learned several valuable lessons that day:

1. Do not trust anyone, or count on anyone at all. Ever. Except for about six people. Because those six people came to my show when I asked them and the rest of the 46, idk what the hell happened to them, and I don't really care.

2. Get a get a drummer who won't fuck up your songs.....we practiced with this guy 3 times including the day of the show, but somehow he forgets ALL the drumbeats we engraved into his head a few hours earlier. our songs couldn't get any more simple. I could do the drums to the song, and I'm the worst drummer aliveeeee.

3. Control your emotions.

I did control my emotions, I almost snapped several times before and during the show thanks to....the drummer. Who else? I'm proud of me AND Thomas for not hopping over the drumset and killing someone during one of our songs.

Ok, let me get to what happened. Me, tim (bassist) Thomas (guitarist) and our friends show up at the insomnia around 6:05. Our show starts at 7. Our drummer didn't show up until 6:55 and it took him about 20 minutes to set the drumset up. Kelso was pretty angry at that. Well, all of us were. So we had 20 minutes to perform our set, instead of 30 minutes.

Once we started our show with our first song, Scott stated he didn't know what we were doing or what was going on. Sooooo that's when going downhill became a bottomless pit for all of us. We ran through the set as quiclky as possible with screwed up drumbeats.

After the show I had several people, well not several but in between 6-8 people tell us how good we were and what not. I appreciated it but I had to let them know what REALLY happened during the set. They all were like "ooooohhh". But we talked to this one band called rescue recovery. They are pretty cool. One of them bought our cd and merch. I will probably attend their august 22nd show since I didn't stay till ten to see them.

We left shortly after and went to waffle house. I didn't eat anything. It seemed gross to me now that I stopped eating it. But just being there with my peoples just made me feel better. =]

But after that, we just screwed around Paulding county. I got that on tape so I won't explain it here. Go to my myspace blog for that.

As for the band???

Were taking a looooooooong break. Our next show will most likely
Be in November. And we are now offically looking for a guitarist and a DRUMMER. So if you do any of those and you are reading this, message, or comment me or something.

Katie is our official new tambourine shaker. Hah. =]

Well...../I'm tired of posting blogs on myspace. I don't know why, I just grew tired of it. SO! I decided that every day I would post a journal on this site expressing my fellings on the particular day. I just feel like I need to express myself more....sooooo here goes.

Today is the day before my band's show at the insomnia. Aaaand I'm really not looking foward to it. Our drummer forgot all the songs, and the guitarist(s) we hired make our music sound like a heavy metal band. WE ARE NOT A HEAVY METAL BAND! I just want to make that clear. If you heard our music it is nowhere near metal. At practice, while teaching them the songs, they magically put in a metal riff/solo into silence is golden and I'm not digging it at alllllll. I'm just nervous and really skeptical about the show. When we have practice before the show tomorrow, hopefully our drummer can (once again) memorize the beats and we sound less metal. But I wanna hope for the best.

Our guitarist is supposed to be coming over to work on the songs, just me and him. I'm confident that he can get them down correctly.

And I have a strong feeling that it's going to be like our last show. NOBODY will be there. And that really makes me angry when people say they WILL go and don't show up. So I texted everyone I know, telling them to be there....I have a gut feeling they won't. Annnd for the people that DO show up there, I know who my true friends/fans are and I thank them greatly for that. For the people that don't........hm.

I don't have to work till Friday. Yeah. =]

My cousins are coming down tomorrow. And they are also are in the band so if all hell breaks loose......

Ok so kelso.....is basically my herrrroooo and I love this girl no matter what happens and I will always be there for her through hell, heaven and back. I just wanna make that clear cause she is down and I hate hate hate to see her down like this because she makes me down. =[ she is definitely NOT one of the most enthusiastic people, but that's what makes her unique and I love her for that.

Kelso, if you are reading this (today) I really hope you feel better. And stop smoking those damn cigarettes.